Which revision should be made to this paragraph? "Finally" should be added to the beginning of sentence 1. In sentence 2, "furthermore" should be changed to "specifically." In sentence 3, "later" should be changed to "therefore." "Moreover" should be added to the beginning of sentence 4.

Question

Wesley Richardson

English

9 September, 10:49

Which revision should be made to this paragraph? "Finally" should be added to the beginning of sentence 1. In sentence 2, "furthermore" should be changed to "specifically." In sentence 3, "later" should be changed to "therefore." "Moreover" should be added to the beginning of sentence 4.

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Answers (1)

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Cristal Norris · Answer 1

This question is missing the paragraph. I've found the complete question online. It is as follows:

Read the paragraph.

(1) Wordsworth believed that poetry should include emotional experiences, and his poem "I Wandered Lonely as a Cloud" includes several of these experiences. (2) Furthermore, the speaker encounters a field of daffodils that he describes as "jocund company." (3) Later, as the speaker reflects on seeing the cheerful daffodils, he says the memory gives him great joy. (4) The speaker realizes that the memory of the flowers provides a more powerful emotional experience than the experience itself did.

Which revision should be made to this paragraph?

-"Finally" should be added to the beginning of sentence 1.

-In sentence 2, "furthermore" should be changed to "specifically."

-In sentence 3, "later" should be changed to "therefore."

-"Moreover" should be added to the beginning of sentence 4.

Answer:

The revision that should be made is - In sentence 2, "furthermore" should be changed to "specifically."

Explanation:

"Furthermore" is an adverb used to add information related to what was previously stated. However, it is inappropriately used in sentence 2. Sentence 2 is specifying one of the experiences included by the poet in his writing. It would be better, therefore, to use "specifically", since we are not really adding, but explaining in a more specific manner what was said in sentence 1. The change would be:

(1) Wordsworth believed that poetry should include emotional experiences, and his poem "I Wandered Lonely as a Cloud" includes several of these experiences. (2) Specifically, the speaker encounters a field of daffodils that he describes as "jocund company."