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21 December, 22:37

What changes can I do in this paragraph?

I was walking home from work in a scary night. The weather was very scary; nothing less than a giant monster. Walking a bit further I was finally on the bus stop. After 10 minutes the bus were finally there. I went inside the bus, no one was there, without me and the bus driver. When going a bit further with the driver I felt unsafe. It seemed to be that the driver were full. The next bus stop was my destination, until the bus driver just ignored my destination and drove further. What I said was " excuse me my destination is behind us" the driver replied with "I know". And when the driver turned his face around I got shocked and couldn't believe what I saw ...

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  1. 21 December, 22:40
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    Answer:Here this should get you a bit more marks.

    Explanation:

    I was walking home from work in dark and gloomy night. The weather was very creepy; nothing less than a giant monster. Walking a bit further I was finally on the bus stop. After 10 minutes the bus were finally there. I went inside the bus, no one was there, just me and the bus driver. When going a bit further on the bus with the driver alone; I felt unsafe. It seemed to be that the driver was full. The next bus stop was my destination, until the bus driver just ignored my destination and drove further. What I said was "Excuse me my destination is behind us" but the driver replied with "I know". And when the driver turned his face around I got terrified and couldn't believe what I was seeing ...

    I changed the saw to I was seeing because you are talking in present tense not paste tense.
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Home » English » What changes can I do in this paragraph? I was walking home from work in a scary night. The weather was very scary; nothing less than a giant monster. Walking a bit further I was finally on the bus stop. After 10 minutes the bus were finally there.
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