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2 June, 10:31

Which revision effectively incorporates transitions to improve the flow of ideas?

Technology and support were important, changing his perspective. He uses a simile "like a bird soaring through the sky" despite how he feels today. Technology and support were important in changing his perspective. To show the contrast of how the speaker feels, he uses a simile "like a bird soaring through the sky" to show how he feels today. Technology and support were very important. However, they changed his perspective. He uses a simile "like a bird soaring through the sky" because of how he feels today. Technology and support were important because they changed his perspective and because he uses a simile "like a bird soaring through the sky" to show how he feels today.

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  1. 2 June, 11:00
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    Read the following excerpt from a student's essay:

    The speaker gives an example of how he used to feel and contrasts that with how he feels today. Technology and support were important. They changed his perspective. He uses a simile "like a bird soaring through the sky" to show how he feels today.

    Which revision effectively incorporates transitions to improve the flow of ideas?

    a. Technology and support were important, changing his perspective. He uses a simile "like a bird soaring through the sky" despite how he feels today.

    b. Technology and support were important in changing his perspective. To show the contrast of how the speaker feels, he uses a simile "like a bird soaring through the sky" to show how he feels today.

    c. Technology and support were very important. However, they changed his perspective. He uses a simile "like a bird soaring through the sky" because of how he feels today.

    d. Technology and support were important because they changed his perspective and because he uses a simile "like a bird soaring through the sky" to show how he feels today.

    Answer:

    b. Technology and support were important in changing his perspective. To show the contrast of how the speaker feels, he uses a simile "like a bird soaring through the sky" to show how he feels today.

    Explanation:

    Transition means to undergo a change from one form to another.

    From the excerpt, the student describes how he used to feel with how he feels today and this was clearly shown with the use of the words, "in changing his perspective" and then makes use of simile "like a bird soaring through the sky" to show his present feelings.

    This revision effectively incorporates the transitions of his past and present feelings to improve the flow of ideas.
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